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Saturday November 8, 2008 9:31 pm

How Does Superman…?




Posted by Joel Rosenberg Categories: Editorials, DC Comics

Superman

Back in the 1950s, also known as my misspent youth, the editors at DC Comics actually tried to answer all the “real life” questions that got tossed at their superheroes, particularly, Superman.  Ignoring the fact that this isn’t real life in the first place, there were a million questions. As no one seemed to worry about continuity back then, a story was written that explained various things such as the following questions.

How did Superman cut his hair?  Afterall, it was invulnerable, just like the rest of him. The answer is he used his heat vision reflected off a mirror. How he shaved they never got into.

Where did the supersuit come from? It had to be invulnerable because the bullets everyone always futilely shot at Supes bounced off it. If it wasn’t invulnerable, there would have been holes in the suit after the shot bounced off Superman.  The answer was that Ma Kent sewed it from the blanket he was wrapped in when the ship that brought Superman to earth crashed. That, of course, begs the question of what kind of super needle she happened to have in her sewing kit.  That’s neither her nor there at this point though.

And the glasses?  I mean, was that all it took for anyone to not notice the resemblance between Clark and Superman?  The answer is that one of Supes’ little know powers is super hypnotism and he used the glasses to focus it so that no one in the world would notice how much they looked alike. Believe me, I wish I was making this explanation up, but I am not.  My colleague, David Torres, wonders what happens if Clark Kent loses the glasses.

Anyway, does anyone remember any more of these?  Want to make up your own scenarios and answer them or have other readers answer them, leave your comments below!

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