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Friday January 21, 2011 5:53 pm
DC’s Comic Book Ratings
DC Comics has announced that they will no longer carry the seal of the Comics Code Authority on the covers of their comics.
Instead, they are going with a new cover ratings system that you can read about at Newsarama.
It’s a good start, but I think that someone should come up with a more accurate way to rate the comics. And that someone could be me. Here are my new ratings suggestions:
S - SOMEONE
We hope someone will buy this comic.
R - REFRIGERATOR
A woman will get stuffed into one.
B - BROKEBACK
Female characters will be scantily clad and twist their bodies into impossible yet titillating positions.
F - FETISH
Contains female sidekick threatened in exciting ways.
C - CONTINUITY
Unless you’ve been reading this title for the last 30 years, don’t bother picking up this issue.
D - DEATH
Someone dies. Maybe someone close to you. In a cape. And boots. Or his girlfriend.
J - JUMPING OFF POINT
This issue marks a change in the title - different creative team, new story direction - that creates the perfect opportunity to finally quit buying it.
G - GREYING MAN-BOYS
Content suitable for readers over 40.
W - WAIT
We'll eventually collect this.
P - PRICE
This issue is shockingly overpriced.
A - AMAZON
This trade paperback is much cheaper at Amazon.
I look forward to seeing these on the covers of comics sometime soon.
[Artwork: The Comics Code Authority seal]
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